12:01 AM May 7th, 2025 Wednesday
My husband just called me from work, telling me, "I'm on my way home..." I told him ok and asked him why? He said his daughter "got into a fight with her roommate and the cops came three times (to her and her roommates apartment) and she was almost got arrested". So his son (the going on 27 year old slob that lives with US) is meeting him over there and that she an her cat will be staying with us awhile. I told him ok, her old room was sweep a few months ago, they can push the furniture back against the walls, and there should be bed sheets in the closet. Then my husband said she might get a room for tonight... I asked him what... and he said, "She might be getting a hotel room for tonight..." I just told him ok.
His "daughter" who suddenly decided in October 2023 that she was "transgender" after having never mentioned this before to her dad, creates her own problems. She accused her two roommates back at that time as "outing her" to her dad and had horrible physical fights with THOSE two girls... That was her THIRD set of roommates in 3 years... the second set was the same thing...the year before she was living filthy with them, as with the third set, and she lived even worse with the last two girls... Also in July 2024 her dad (My husband) paid for her to have her breast removed. (A very sudden decision as with her sudden decision she was gay and then transgender...) My husband has never acted with a "father" or parent figure to either her or his nearly 27 year old son. When I came here six years ago he wanted ME to "be a mother to my kids".... WHO were both ADULTS as the daughter was 18 (within 3 months) and the son was 21 YEARS old. He want ME to mother them and disciple them!! He threw ALL that off ON ME until the end 2023. I just basically stopped doing anything for his "kids" because the son is abusive, filthy living in a garbage room, filthy mouthed and disrespectful of his dad and ME. I however, did take my husband and his daughter to her "surgery" to have her breast removed in JULY 2024 and to two checkups after that.
MY husband needs to put his foot DOWN with both his "kids" as he calls them. WE CANNOT keep putting out $2500 a month for his daughter to live "own her own in her own apartment" when WE have paid for all this for the last 3 1/2 years... YET, my husband "allows" this. HIS son lays up in the bedroom in our house in filth, with fast food garbage everywhere. MY husband has NOT made him even attempt to clean the room in 3 years!!!!!! My husband says he's retiring this Autumn, THAT will NEVER happen. HE will work at least TWO more years... because I KNOW he's not retiring then. His daughter has never held a job and she will be 24 in 6 months!! This job she has now is basically a "caregiver" job like the work I was doing up until 2021. She's ONLY had this job since the end of February (2025) and hasn't been working full time with it. I just paid her $700 rent for her on May 2cd... because my husband said we needed to pay it for her this month as she could not afford to pay it... because she didn't work enough hours the last two weeks.
ALSO... about her almost going to jail tonight for fighting with her roommate... she already has a report (police report) of her fighting with her last two roommates back in the summer of last year (2024) so if the police was called three times tonight they probably SAW that report when they pulled up her name. She (his daughter) is the one that "approved" her current roommate... (who my husband says is also wants to be "transgender"... (I do not know as I have never met the person). HE says it's a woman trying to be a guy... AND I just found out two days ago that this person told his (my husband's daughter) before she/he moved in with her that they are bi polar and have other issues (according to my husband's daughter). Neither she nor the landlord did any background checks on this person and this person never even sighed a lease with the landlord. MY point is why is the person even still there? MY other point is MY husband's daughter can NOT get along in peace with ANYONE. She's a bully (like my husband and his son both have been with ME in the past). Like MY sister has said, they (my husband's "kids") are beginning to have "rude awakenings" in their lives because of their meanness toward other people, and their bullying hatefulness.
It's proven over the last 3 1/2 years that his daughter can't get along with anyone she spends any amount of time with. ANOTHER thing she's come up with this idea to move 60 miles from the big city to a smaller town (not a little town) because she's been "dating" a girl there... this came up 2 1/2 weeks ago. Thus, some of this recent roommate trouble is probably her excuse to move. Her dad (my husband) just told her a week and a half ago or LESS that she COULD NOT move unless she had a full time job, as she was also telling him she had "job burnout"... AFTER ONLY 2 months of work !!?????? I told him then YOU NEED to tell her to STAY at the job she's at for A YEAR, start looking for another job while she works, BECAUSE she has NO work experience (and WE PAID for four freaking years of college for her... supposingly so she could start out with a good job...). I told MY husband tell her to KEEP the job she has and begin looking for another job. IF she finds another job then leave where she is for it... otherwise SHE's going to get a quick reputation as a job hopper and no will hire her...and after all the freaking money we paid ($30,000 plus thousand a year for her college, rent, etc.) she's going to END up with a 50 hour a week job that she could have gotten with out all the money we spend sending her to collage. (She even played around so much in college that she didn't get her diploma until about 10 months after she actually "graduated"... the college allowed her to walk at graduation but would not give her her certificate of graduation until she made up like 5 credits. (Which she lied to her dad about telling him she only needed 2... then three. BUT when I asked her outright with him NOT around... she admitted it was 5 credits she lacked.) WE PAID her rent, water, lights, internet, and groceries and she couldn't even had the decency to keep up her college work???????????????
SO tonight she's caused a complete uproar for NO apparent reason. MY husband tried to tell her leave her roommate alone and not confront she/he. ALL of this just begin the last two weeks, AFTER MY husband's daughter told her dad she wanted to move from the big city to the smaller town 60 miles away (because she's "dating" a girl up there). RIGHT --she's dating a girl... this has consisted of my husband taking her back and forth TWICE to spend 2 days with this girl. I'm not being mean, but NO ONE is going to live with my husband's daughter. HIS freaking son that lives with us, doesn't want to live with her, and when my husband suggested last summer (2024) that she let his son/her brother move in, and be her roommate, she said, "NO, he's too messy..." ??? Well, they should live together... then it would be filth living with filth, because that's is how they live. My husband and I have moved her into every place she's lived. The last two girls she had as roommates that she abused, and fought with, and moved out of in June 2024, were clean and nice girls. The room my husband's daughter moved into there, was CLEAN when she moved in... even the carpet had been professionally cleaned. YET, when she moved out, it looked like a filthy mess, it was... she had never vacuumed it at all, never cleaned it, and it was matted and filthy (and it was like berber carpet... very short and curled loops into it's self, and looked new). That's where she pooped in the toilet, and left it a month while one roommate went home, to New England states, on vacation and came back a month later, find the toilet still full of sh*t because my husband's daughter could not even call the landlord or the maintenance man!!
They, My husband, his daughter and his son, about 1AM with her and her cat (a gray/blue cat that is now close to 10 years old) that she just had to take with her when she moved from the college dorm to her first apartment. (This cat is back about attacking and bullying other cats.) One of my little calico girls brought him back to life literally when he was grieving to death 5 years ago after the old female cat they had died at about 15 years old. My little calico kitten kept rubbing on him and loving him until he accepted her. Without her he would have died of grief.
I lost this little girl, after being FORCED by my husband to move her up to our old country house last year (2024). She was only 3 years old. She had been raised here (the city house) with US and it was too difficult on her up there. She grieved for me and for us. THIS is a big reason I want my OWN home away from MY husband's abuse... I don't care if he's a saint toward me the next 100 years... I STILL WILL HAVE MY OWN HOME WHERE HE CAN NEVER SPEAK A CROSS WORD TOWARD ME AND MY ANIMALS AGAIN.
His daughter wanted to know if the cat was going into our bedroom. I told her "No... he's going into your old bedroom." She started to object, and I just told her, "My cat lives in there and he's had ringworm and you cat needs to stay in your room." (Which is true, my cat did have ringworm from a stray that I fostered a few weeks.) Anyway she was quiet and put him in her old bedroom. (I swept it and cleaned it part way last year and then decided I'm not doing anymore cleaning here than I have to because it does no good.)
I've given up on a "home" here... I literally just want to get me and my animals moved to TN again... as my first husband and I'd planned to do before he died. I WANT to live in a little cooler climate with FOUR gorgeous seasons. The two houses I had saved here, one which I toured physically three times... that I was sure I was going to get, sold last month. AFTER two years. Then the other one I had saved here for a year, is pending. I took this as a signal to just pray for, find a home in TN and a way/means/ monies to get it and live there. SIGH.
My husband's son took his daughter to a "hotel" for tonight... she couldn't just stay in her old bedroom he took her to a Best Western. She's supposed to have a job interview in the morning at 9am... ?? Then about 40 minutes ago my husband called into work and is taking off tomorrow. Then he's working Thursday night and supposed to be off Fri., Sat., Sun. I pray he works the weekend. REALLY.
I'm tired. I'm going to attempt to lay down and go to sleep. I had to cook my husband a hamburger an hour ago. I cooked baked chicken and rice ....He didn't want that. So I cooked him and myself a hamburger...giving him almost half of mine because after he ate his he said he was still hungry... and I didn't feel like getting him more food. It was simpler to just give him half of mine.
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May 7th, 2025 Wednesday 3:39 AM ------
>>>>>> I wanted to add something here. I just got up and fed my three cats in the kitchen/living room their can of wet food... and remembered I didn't write/document this. The last two days I've had my right knee hunting badly making me "hobble" on it. This actually begin a few days ago... whatever day I got out in the dog yard (at our city house) and used a shovel to cut down the weeds/wild flowers all around the fence and house. (The day about 4 days ago, when my husband bitched about the dogs digging in their yard, and digging in his "compost pit" which he made in their yard about a year and a half ago.) So I went to our old country house last night and tended the little goats and cats. They have plenty of feed and water / hay, etc to last 4 days if needed, although I will be going back Friday.
MY point is my knees begin bothering me being very stiff after ALL that work in the dog yard. My husband KNEW my right knee was making me hobble on it yesterday and today (Wed), YET I had to cook him a hamburger a few hours ago even though I had baked chicken and rice already cooked. He hasn't said, "Baby I'm sorry your knee is bothering you." "Baby can I help you" or anything like that. THE only thing he did was put a load of wash into the washer after I asked him to. I had to gather them and pack them to him in the living room. He literally ONLY put them in the washing machine when I just told him, "I need you to put these into the machine." I put the detergent in and started them to wash, etc.
I do not believe he helped his deceased wife much, if at all after her back got bad and she lay in bed more the last few years of her life. She must have taken care of herself because they left her to go on vacation the the summer before she died and I think he told me they'd (he and the "kids" had gone somewhere the month before she died. (Or was overdosed by her own son I should write. I can't even think about this right now... that this same almost 27 year old "man" that my husband has allowed to live with US the entire 6 plus years we've been together, overdosed his own mother. This comes from his own mouth... telling me the first year my husband and I were together, "I didn't know the doctor changed her medication and I was supposed to ONLY give my Mom one pill instead of two..." For the first few months of hearing this back then I thought he was just feeling guilty that she was dead... then I REALIZED he was confessing to actually killing her and feeling guilty about the horror he'd did to him own Mother.)
Anyway... it's all too much for ME anymore here. God, I need and want to be out of this warped drama and horror of my husband and his two "kids". I'm TIRED. I gave them 6 plus years of my life. I'm NOT responsible for their personalities, their abuse of his wife/ their Mom... or their psychotic issues. I want to have my own home where myself and my animals are safe and never abused again. I want to live in peace, comfort, love, joy, happiness, health and prosperity.